The winning bid for my beard was $34.00.
Can you believe that a person can sell their beard for $34?
I was hoping that the winner of the auction would request that I do something completely outlandish with my beard. But instead, he just asked that I shave it.


Just like that I transformed into a reasonable looking person.
Too bad for me, all I’ve really got going for me is looking ridiculous.


I love it. It’s wonderful. We can get you corporate sponsers now. Oh wait...you wouldn’t be able to stand that.