I’ve heard people say that all we have is our time. And while I like that sentiment, really all we have is Jesus. Everything flows from our relationship with our Lord and if you don’t have that relationship, you really don’t have anything.
But beyond that, our time is truly one of the most important things we have to give.
God has done so much quiet work in me that I only see when I step back and think about how stressed and overwhelmed I was 5 or 6 years ago. He has done a great readjustment in my heart and our routine and schedules to make our daily lives run more smoothly. A huge part of that has been God showing me to be okay with saying no, even to good things.
I have learned that it’s most important to give my family and my husband my best. If we are pouring out more for others than we are for our people, then something is amiss.
Unfortunately we often give our families our worst.
We make excuses for treating them poorly like, “Well, it’s just because I’m so comfortable with them!”
Treating our family disrespectfully isn’t a question of closeness or comfort, but of priorities. If our priorities are screwed up it will cause us to care more about our public appearance than our private love.
Is it more important to us to be busy “doing good things”, or more important to quietly and intentionally invest in our families day after day? To invest well in our families we have to have the space to do so. We cannot be so filled up with “good stuff” that we are “bad” to those closest to us.
I used to be the one yelling at my kids because I was overwhelmed by all that we had going on. I would be angry with Brad over stupid things that didn’t matter. And while I’m not perfect and these things still happen, I also see the ways God has transformed me by showing me that the most important things in life (God, spouse, family) have to actually come first.
Sports cannot come first. Ministry cannot come first. Friends cannot come first. Serving others cannot come first.
God needs to be number one, then our marriages, then our children. From the beauty and overflow of those relationships, then God will pour out for every other thing He is calling us to.
He will only call us to what He can provide for, so if we are stressed out and overwhelmed we need to discern whether or not we are doing things, even good things, that are not within our calling.
We have to say no good opportunities to say yes to our priorities.