The Wonderful Birthing of Oz

You would think I would have this whole going in labor thing down pat by now, but when I felt a gush of liquid around 4 am on Friday morning I was certain I had just peed my pants. I really wasn’t expecting to go into labor for another week so after using the bathroom I laid back down and continued to ponder whether my water had just broken or my bladder was weak.

Eventually I had more leakage and knew that my water had indeed broken. I worked through some disappointment with this being the way that I was going into labor again. This is the fourth time my water has broken before I have any significant labor or contractions and it has always made for a long haul. I tried my hardest to go back to sleep but all I could think about was how messy the house was. Then I tried to not think about how messy my house was because I knew that would make me anxious and stall labor even further. This cycle went on and on until everyone awoke.

I told Brad that I was pretty sure that my water had broken but there was no need to be concerned because we all know it could still be days before baby was born. I told him to go to work, do all the normal stuff and try not to think about having a baby today. I didn’t tell any of the kids for quite some time because I wanted it to be as routine of a day as possible.

I power cleaned the bathrooms, tidied and swept, got the newborn diapers out and put the clothes in a cute little basket.

We ate lunch and I made jello and hot cocoa for the kids while my contractions picked up slightly. I tried to keep my mood elevated but around dinnertime I felt kind of down at my lack of progress. Brad suggested we go make a latte at the schoolhouse so I loaded up a jar of fresh milk and we made some drinks.

I came home and retreated to the bedroom to prepare it for labor. Sol hung Christmas lights and I sat in the waning daylight focusing on settling my mind and making space for baby to come.

The kids watched a movie then went to sleep with a kiss and a “maybe you’ll wake up to a baby!” I spent some time watching a movie by myself but turned it off because it felt distracting. Eventually I did start having some more intense contractions, especially after Hal came in and snuggled me. That oxytocin did me good, but I knew that if I got up a moved around it was very likely that the intensity would slow. Unfortunately that did happen and I fell asleep for the evening. I woke to some curious girls poking their head in to see if there was a baby next to me.

We had a lovely French toast breakfast and spent the morning worshiping and hanging out together. I was grateful that it was a Saturday and we didn’t have to decide if Brad would go to work or not. I was only having mild contractions so we decided to go to the coffee shop with everyone for a few minutes to get out of the house.

My midwife, Tiffany, came in the afternoon to check in and see how I was doing. I tried some tinctures and herbs but they didn’t pick up my contractions at all. She left to do some shopping in town and when she checked in later to little progress asked if I would want to try castor oil again (this is what helped my labor pick up with Hal). At that point I had a choice to let this take its course and possibly be in labor limbo for the next couple of days or give the castor oil a whirl and possibly have a baby that evening. I felt more stressed out about the decision than I probably should have but I decided to pray and hope that the castor oil would do it again.

I sucked down the world’s grossest smoothie around 5 and contractions picked up within an hour or two. Around 7:30 or 8 I let Tiffany know that if she was ready to come back that I thought labor was actually progressing. She checked on baby’s heart rate and then retreated back downstairs to let me labor privately. I told her I would let her know when I felt like I wanted to get in the tub and then she would start setting up everything for the birth.

The intensity of the contractions picked up and I told Brad to start filling our tub. I was still so nervous to get in because I didn’t want to do anything to stall labor again, but a few minutes after I sank into the warm water I knew I was going to have a baby in a few hours.

Brad was next to me, but also in and out trying to get the kids down for the night. Hal is not the best at going to bed so we sent him down to the basement with Ira and Theo assuming he would just fall asleep while watching a show. Little did we know he would still be awake at one AM after baby was born!

I really enjoyed (as much as one can enjoy) this stage of labor. My contractions were intense but very manageable with breathing. My every surge I did my best to soften and visualize him moving down to be born. There was worship music quietly playing in the background and I had great periods of rest and quiet in between contractions.

At one point Winnie wandered in after the contractions were fairly intense. I could tell she was worried but curious so she hung around for awhile before Brad sent her to bed. She was able to witness part of the labor process but also not be there for when things got a little wild right before he came.

I have never felt so close to the Lord during birth. With every surge I could feel the Holy Spirit urging me that it was time to be done striving. I didn’t have to try to have a baby, I just had to surrender to what was already happening. I felt such peace knowing that this was also a greater life lesson for me. So much of what the Lord has been teaching me lately is just this: I need to surrender instead of strive.

I felt a little pushy during these contractions but was still at peace and began to think that I had made it through transition without nausea or overwhelm. I was finally going to have a baby in one of those really calm ways that I sometimes see on birthing videos.

Then Brad reminded me that I would get to a place where I felt really uncomfortable and overwhelming and I did not appreciate that. I would show him, I was close to pushing!

Behold, Brad was right and transition came as it always does. I began to feel waves of nausea with every contraction. I became extremely uncomfortable and tried to move around in the tub to help with the pain. The castor oil worked against me while pushing and I had a bowel movement in the tub which sent me hopping out. I knew I was panicking and had lost my focus. I sat on the toilet which felt quite comfortable but my midwife did not want me to stay there and deliver a baby in the toilet (I cannot imagine letting that happen lol) so she sat up a towel on the floor of the bathroom. I dropped to my hands and knees and roared the head out. I actually didn’t have any idea his head was out until I reached back and Tiffany told me that I was poking his eyes. Oops.

With one more surge of pain I roared again and his little body exited mine. I pulled him up to my chest and sat back on my knees and began marveling at our fifth son and seventh child. I always feel like words do not suffice for this moment. The pain and misery totally dissipate the moment you are face to face with new life. We sat that way for quite a while waiting for the placenta to come. Brad and I marveled at his features and chatted with Tiffany. Eventually we get to move to the bed where I birthed the placenta and nursed Oswald James for the first time.

Remember the part of the story where Hal went to the basement to “fall asleep” with the older boys. Well he made his reappearance with two very tired big brothers who now have a lifelong story about how they had to watch the same show over and over again with their little brother while their mom had another baby upstairs. Ira guessed the birth time correctly because once he heard my screaming (through two floors no less) he knew it was getting close. I wonder what these memories of birth and new babies will feel like to them as their grow older, but I’m grateful that we all really like to be together. Hal spent a few minutes just staring at his baby brother, mostly exhausted but also likely confused and in shock. He quickly settled into sleep now that he was back with papa.

Once everything was cleaned up I proceeded to sleep like a rock for about 4 hours until the younger kids awoke.

The girls peeked into the room and this time I got to smile and say “He’s here”.